writing papers about things I am legitimately interested/passionate about.

Makes it not even a chore, but a gradual, comfortable albeit long journey.

and when you share it with people, you’re actually really into your findings. and you like sharing.

lul

/nerd

p.s. too bad can’t do that with math

math sux!

can’t wait til schools out! i feel like spring has been a good fun.

crazy, but good.

nonstop shizz but it was super fun :). kind of excessive busyy-wise, but i liked the craziness of it all!

got up at like 1045 after sleeping at like 545 from working on paper.

classes up until 4. then met starbucks with fam to go to training from 5-7. really interesting stuff, got trained in handling sexual assault victims. i swear i’m learning so much through this experience. blessed <3.

then right after..brother’s appreciation! even though it was kind of put together last minute, our luau was a total success! the bros loved it!! i really love how chill our brother group is <3 i luff dem. they entered the streamers where there were given leis and really nice placards with their names on them. the decor was really really creative and beautiful for being last minute. then we ate bomb hawaiian bbq and spam musubi…i had a talkative table so i didn’t have to talk much yay HAHA.  then we played games outside! water balloon toss…my partner and i dropped it SO many times but we ended up being last 4 standing b/c our balloon was SO durable.then this game where we held hands in a circle and tried to get the other people next to us to touch a trash can in the middle. the boys got really rough with it and it was painful :(. but anyways haha we went back inside and played ‘newlywed’ game. so easy! when i got veronica we both guessed each others hometowns correctly b/c we’re BOTH FROM CERRITOS! LOL! :)  lucky! and when nick and i had to guess each other’s ethnicity, he already knew mines! and his was obviously chinese. i really wish i took a pic of the decor it was so nice :(. then dessert of chocolate cream pie and sprite+rainbow sherbet (jolly juice!).  THEN we gave them our gifts of beloved sainthood kitkats, dope woven bracelets [i want one..lol], and picture frame of us all <3. awwww! then we gave them customized awards based on how well we know each other!! the guys really liked that the best b/c we highlighted their strengths :). then pictures and then done! honestly, my sisters are freaking amazing for putting this together last minute b/c i srsly didn’t do jack! bahaha they’re awesome :).

then right after brother’s appreciation, nonstop nonstop! banquet dance practice from 1030-130. 

i’m so dead. i didn’t even have time to go to my room i turn in my research paper by midnight -_- that i finished yesterday! gah!!

but i loved today. my legs are so tired they can’t move, but it was nonstop crazy insanity + fun.! yayy!

whee

Source: http://www.purposefairy.com/3308/15-things-you-should-give-up-in-order-to-be-happy/

Here is a list of 15 things which, if you give up on them, will make your life a lot easier and much, much happier. We hold on to so many things that cause us a great deal of pain, stress and suffering – and instead of letting them all go, instead of allowing ourselves to be stress free and happy – we cling on to them. Not anymore. Starting today we will give up on all those things that no longer serve us, and we will embrace change. Ready? Here we go:

1. GIVE UP YOUR NEED TO ALWAYS BE RIGHT

There are so many of us who can’t stand the idea of being wrong – wanting to always be right – even at the risk of ending great relationships or causing a great deal of stress and pain, for us and for others. It’s just not worth it. Whenever you feel the ‘urgent’ need to jump into a fight over who is right and who is wrong, ask yourself this question: “Would I rather be right, or would I rather be kind?” Wayne Dyer. What difference will that make? Is your ego really that big?

2. GIVE UP YOUR NEED FOR CONTROL

Be willing to give up your need to always control everything that happens to you and around you – situations, events, people, etc. Whether they are loved ones, coworkers, or just strangers you meet on the street – just allow them to be. Allow everything and everyone to be just as they are and you will see how much better will that make you feel.

“By letting it go it all gets done. The world is won by those who let it go. But when you try and try. The world is beyond winning.” Lao Tzu

3. GIVE UP ON BLAME

Give up on your need to blame others for what you have or don’t have, for what you feel or don’t feel. Stop giving your powers away and start taking responsibility for your life.

4. GIVE UP YOUR SELF-DEFEATING SELF-TALK

 Oh my. How many people are hurting themselves because of their negative, polluted and repetitive self-defeating mindset? Don’t believe everything that your mind is telling you – especially if it’s negative and self-defeating. You are better than that.

“The mind is a superb instrument if used rightly. Used wrongly, however, it becomes very destructive.” Eckhart Tolle

5. GIVE UP YOUR LIMITING BELIEFS

about what you can or cannot do, about what is possible or impossible. From now on, you are no longer going to allow your limiting beliefs to keep you stuck in the wrong place. Spread your wings and fly!

“A belief is not an idea held by the mind, it is an idea that holds the mind” Elly Roselle

6. GIVE UP COMPLAINING

Give up your constant need to complain about those many, many, maaany things – people, situations, events that make you unhappy, sad and depressed. Nobody can make you unhappy, no situation can make you sad or miserable unless you allow it to. It’s not the situation that triggers those feelings in you, but how you choose to look at it. Never underestimate the power of positive thinking.

7. GIVE UP THE LUXURY OF CRITICISM

Give up your need to criticize things, events or people that are different than you. We are all different, yet we are all the same. We all want to be happy, we all want to love and be loved and we all want to be understood. We all want something, and something is wished by us all.

8. GIVE UP YOUR NEED TO IMPRESS OTHERS

Stop trying so hard to be something that you’re not just to make others like you. It doesn’t work this way. The moment you stop trying so hard to be something that you’re not, the moment you take off all your masks, the moment you accept and embrace the real you, you will find people will be drawn to you, effortlessly.

9. GIVE UP YOUR RESISTANCE TO CHANGE

Change is good. Change will help you move from A to B. Change will help you make improvements in your life and also the lives of those around you. Follow your bliss, embrace change – don’t resist it.
“Follow your bliss and the universe will open doors for you where there were only walls” Joseph Campbell

10. GIVE UP LABELS

Stop labeling those things, people or events that you don’t understand as being weird or different and try opening your mind, little by little. Minds only work when open. “The highest form of ignorance is when you reject something you don’t know anything about.” Wayne Dyer

11. GIVE UP ON YOUR FEARS

Fear is just an illusion, it doesn’t exist – you created it. It’s all in your mind. Correct the inside and the outside will fall into place.
“The only thing we have to fear, is fear itself.” Franklin D. Roosevelt

12. GIVE UP YOUR EXCUSES

Send them packing and tell them they’re fired. You no longer need them. A lot of times we limit ourselves because of the many excuses we use. Instead of growing and working on improving ourselves and our lives, we get stuck, lying to ourselves, using all kind of excuses – excuses that 99.9% of the time are not even real.

13. GIVE UP THE PAST

I know, I know. It’s hard. Especially when the past looks so much better than the present and the future looks so frightening, but you have to take into consideration the fact that the present moment is all you have and all you will ever have. The past you are now longing for – the past that you are now dreaming about – was ignored by you when it was present. Stop deluding yourself. Be present in everything you do and enjoy life. After all life is a journey not a destination. Have a clear vision for the future, prepare yourself, but always be present in the now.

14. GIVE UP ATTACHMENT

This is a concept that, for most of us is so hard to grasp and I have to tell you that it was for me too, (it still is) but it’s not something impossible. You get better and better at with time and practice. The moment you detach yourself from all things, (and that doesn’t mean you give up your love for them – because love and attachment have nothing to do with one another,  attachment comes from a place of fear, while love… well, real love is pure, kind, and self less, where there is love there can’t be fear, and because of that, attachment and love cannot coexist) you become so peaceful, so tolerant, so kind, and so serene. You will get to a place where you will be able to understand all things without even trying. A state beyond words.

15. GIVE UP LIVING YOUR LIFE TO OTHER PEOPLE’S EXPECTATIONS

Way too many people are living a life that is not theirs to live. They live their lives according to what others think is best for them, they live their lives according to what their parents think is best for them, to what their friends, their enemies and their teachers, their government and the media think is best for them. They ignore their inner voice, that inner calling. They are so busy with pleasing everybody, with living up to other people’s expectations, that they lose control over their lives. They forget what makes them happy, what they want, what they need….and eventually they forget about themselves.  You have one life – this one right now – you must live it, own it, and especially don’t let other people’s opinions distract you from your path.

getting a to-go box for food and GUESS what i ran into?

MUN DELEGATES! HAHAHAH.

today was the uci conference, i had totally forgot :b. FIRST ran into my MUN friend that I met at the Berkeley conference, and then ran into a lot of cerritosans. 

i’m going to go visit the committees soon.

nothing about the game has changed really…the cute white boys (still there, no cougar but DEEEENG…), the girls who cry at lunch ‘cause they effed up in committee, the heels and fashion….made me reminisce. i noticed that so many of the pictures of my wall ARE of mun. 
i miss the intensity of the debate, meeting new people, collaborating ideas, speaking intelligently, manipulating and taking down backstabbers/shady people, and dominating (God-willing). the friends from all over that you can visit when you travel once again, and sightseeing in foreign places between committee days.  i miss dressing up, gossiping about boys, passing prank notes, the socials, eating out after. the overnight sleeping, praying before entering committee/awards ceremony, eating out after the whole conference to analyze every detail that happened, everything. never realized what a big, soft spot of my heart MUN had taken up.  i was SO excited when i saw delegates, walking nervously back to committee, murmuring their speeches under their breath. reminded me so much of ME. so grateful for being immersed in that experience in HS.  it was one of the main shaping factors for me.

and made me realize how

you don’t know what you got til its gonee~

can’t believe it.

4 more weeks of school.

HELLLZUH panicking.*$#^@^$^@#&!@^#!*&!!!!

have to get my act together academically, (SERIOUSLY, i have been getting the WORST grades lately and this hole may be too deep to climb out of. need to slaughter my final paper and finals to do decently this quarter -_- so…unfeasible.)

survive all the end-of-the-year activities crazinessss (end-of-the-year banquets, brother’s appreciation, birthdayy dinners, orientation training, retreat insanity, banquet performances practices, road trip, sleepover, finals weeeeeek studying no sleeeep)

and a DAY after moving out (which is the last day of my final), go to Chicago by myself for a week!!!! solo adventures, exploring the city on my own with a car, visiting familyyy , volunteering at a rave (?) AHHHHH. then RIGHT after i get back, summer school starts. intense chemistry is intense.  then the week between my 2 summer sessions, canada with the family, and be an orientation counselor for like 5+ orientations while finishing up my 2nd session of summer, chem AND psych.

then sophomore year starts.

looks like i have my work cut out for me D:

beast mode…! *inhale, exhale, inhale, exhale*

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH AHHHHHH x32425313897

i missed my first class, got up at noon, and went through the general motions of the rest of this CRAZY wed. my weds are always the craziest :(. 

back-to-back-to-back obligations until 11pm.

but it was chill today. 

for training, heard the freedom writers REAL person (the one hilary swank played) speak. i didn’t know she went to uci. very inspiring lady! made me realize mah blessins

then had like one of those good ol’ 4 hour convos in the car.

i miss those.

man i love deep convos..wheee or not even deep, shallow convos can be fun too ^_^ heheeh

for like 3 hours.

choreographed with Adri for 1.5, learned a piece to ‘Call me Maybe” for the other.

SO fun so fun ahhhh.

after all dat dancing i felt dem endorphins going all craycray giving me happiness namsayin?!

i missed dancing so much!

honestly can’t live without it.

it lifts my mood and actuallly motivates me to start my work.

i just realized this is what i’ve been missing for all those weeks i’ve been in a lazy funk..:o yup yup!

just finished a midterm i studied all night for…chillin’ now

looking forward to the summer ahhh!

adventure times to da max

Me: So when will you be back in Cerritos? :)

T: I don’t know if I’ll be able to come back..I fly to Hong Kong on Monday, then Beijing, then meeting a friend in Rome in June, we’re backpacking through France, then I’m studying in Spain for 5 weeks, and then I’m working in Spain for four weeks before I start fall semester.

…

okay T_T i guess we can’t hang out

wahhhh people like this make me feel like i’m missing out on lyfe lolol